Contact Local Chapter 137 | Fraternal Order of the Elders of Zion | The Fraternal Order of the Elders of Zion

Contact Us

Get in Touch

We welcome correspondence from prospective members, journalists seeking comment on world events we definitely did not orchestrate, and anyone who accidentally ended up here while looking for something else.

Please complete the form below. Sheldon’s nephew is working on the form backend and it should be operational shortly. He said this in February. We remain optimistic.

Your Email Address

<div style="margin-bottom: 1.2rem;">
  <label for="contact-subject" style="display: block; font-weight: bold; margin-bottom: 0.3rem;">Subject</label>
  <select id="contact-subject" name="subject" style="width: 100%; padding: 0.5rem 0.6rem; font-size: 1rem; border: 1px solid #999; background: white;">
    <option value="">— Select a Subject —</option>
    <option value="general">General Inquiry</option>
    <option value="laser">Space Laser Complaint</option>
    <option value="membership">Membership Question</option>
    <option value="potluck">Potluck RSVP</option>
    <option value="conspiracy">I'd Like to Report a Conspiracy</option>
  </select>
</div>

<div style="margin-bottom: 1.2rem;">
  <label for="contact-message" style="display: block; font-weight: bold; margin-bottom: 0.3rem;">Message</label>
  <textarea id="contact-message" name="message" rows="6" placeholder="Please describe your inquiry. If reporting a conspiracy, please include approximate scope (regional, national, global) and whether you believe we are involved. In most cases we are not." style="width: 100%; padding: 0.5rem 0.6rem; font-size: 1rem; border: 1px solid #999; resize: vertical;"></textarea>
</div>

<button type="submit" style="padding: 0.6rem 1.4rem; font-size: 1rem; background: var(--navy, #1a2744); color: white; border: none; cursor: pointer;">Submit Message</button>

⚠ NOTICE REGARDING FORM FUNCTIONALITY: This form does not currently submit. Sheldon's nephew Josh is building the backend. He got a new job in January and has been very busy. If your matter is urgent, please bring it up at the next monthly meeting or leave a note with Sheldon. For space laser inquiries, please contact Chapter 415 directly. We cannot help you. We do not have their number either.

Other Ways to Reach Us

Monthly Meetings: First Wednesday of each month. Location announced via email list (contact Morty to be added).
The Binder: A physical message log is available at all meetings. Sign in, leave a note. Sheldon reviews it occasionally.
Email: Morty manages the chapter email. He checks it. Eventually.

Response times vary. We are a small organization with large ambitions and limited bandwidth.